3 Public Speaking Hacks
For decades, public speaking has been the number 1 social fear every time people are polled.
What’s interesting, especially with younger generations, is the way communication is happening. Plenty of people have grown to be comfortable communicating information while still in isolation. But there is a big difference between talking into a camera or phone alone and communicating with people live.
*Disclaimer* I am not someone who thinks it’s sad or is upset that millennials and generation z use technology the way we do. It’s just what is now. And for many, it’s a way to express themselves that maybe they couldn’t do otherwise. Are there misuses and issues below the surface? Of course. But all in all - it’s an outlet. An outlet that some even find a way to make a living off of.
I’m completely comfortable talking to a camera. I always have been (in my speaking career) and the pandemic really helped me sharpen my approach with it.
The social component of being able to speak in front of others or in communication with others is a skill.
There are different things that fill me up and that drain me when it comes to speaking. You probably have settings and stages you feel more comfortable or less comfortable in or on too.
If I’m on stage in front of 3,000 people (happened a few times before) and I’m given the microphone - I love it! I thrive in it! It’s one of my favorite things. It’s an opportunity to engage and win over a group of people.
I also spend a lot of time 1 on 1 or in small group settings of 2-6 people. I absolutely love this as well! It’s fun to be in more personal conversations and get to learn about others or have healthy discussion.
What I find challenging is getting into the mid-size group range of about 7-30 people. That’s a pretty big span, I know. But it’s where I get the most nervous. It’s too large to get to know everyone well or have everyone be afforded the opportunity to contribute and it’s too small to fill a small auditorium. It’s not a bad number of people - it’s just my most challenging, personally. It takes a lot of to get over the hump.
Whether it’s speaking on a stage or having a conversation with a friend, I have a few tips that I believe can help set you up to win the next moment you find yourself in the middle of the world’s number 1 social fear.
1) Speak WITH not AT your audience
The audience is not the enemy. They may not start out completely on your side but they can join you more easily than you think.
My friend Jason coaches speakers on this very idea. You want to look for ways to connect with your audience. For me, the number one way I can connect with an audience is through humor. I love to share a story or make a joke that gets people laughing or at the very least, attentive.
You do not need to be a comedian or even use humor as a way to break down barriers. The very best way to speak with your audience is to be sincere. Be you. Don’t try to fake it. If you don’t speak very often in public, let people know, “I don’t speak very often in public but I’m here today because I believe in this message.” What you have to share should be less about you and your ability to speak and more about your audience and what they have to gain. When you approach an opportunity like that, it’s reflective in how you come across.
The best way to win with this hack is to use “we” not “you” when offering action steps.
2) Avoid the Flex
This is my jam. While I’ve been working out a lot lately and have flexed in the mirror a few times over the last month, I’m good at dodging the speaking “flex.” I did it already and you may not have realized it. A subtle, self-deprecating jab is where I love to live as a speaker.
When you assert yourself over your entire audience, it comes off as arrogant. The fastest way to win people over is to humanize yourself. The fastest way to lose your audience is to make yourself out to have an unattainable stature.
Recently, I heard a speaker introduced with all his accolades. It’s not a bad thing to have a list of accomplishments but in this 3 minute intro, nearly 1 minute of it was spent talking about how they went to “states” in high school football. The speaker is in his 60’s. And it was not an audience of football players. Props to him on the accomplishment and all. But I was thinking to myself, “are we really bringing his high school letterman’s jacket up 45 years later?” When he began to speak, he doubled down on his high school football days and I tuned out. Arrogance is attractive to some but not most.
Hear me out here. It’s not bad to let people know of achievements you’ve made but use it as a way to build credibility with your audience, not belittle them. Remember, you want to be relatable not unattainable.
The best way to win with this hack is to find common ground with your audience.
3) Aim for Inspiration over Information
Your bullet points will only take you so far. As a matter of fact, even the best note takers still do not retain more than 10% of what your communicate to them. Your information should be good (I hope this is beneficial right now!) but when speaking, your body language and your perceived goals are what do the talking.
If you’re trying to rush through information, your audience will likely learn but not be motivated. Over the years, I’ve developed into a place where I can memorize a lot of what I’d like to communicate. One of my goals in doing this is to speak without a table or podium in front of me that separates me from my audience. It’s another social/mental barrier that puts a gap between myself and my audience. There are times when I do miss something I had in my notes that I felt was worth sharing, but my overall engagement is much, much higher when I take this approach. And, as it turns out, I still miss things when I have my notes right in front of me.
The reason I do this is because my goal is not for everyone listening to remember every word of my talk - my goal is to inspire change and action.
“Knowledge is power but without action is useless.” - someone smarter than me.
Before we even begin to speak, we should know where we want to take the audience and what we want to inspire them to do.
The best way to win with this hack is speak with the action step in mind.
I hope these tips help you for a moment when you’re called on to speak or even in your daily conversations!